Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Waiting on number 2!

*I am going to try and be as honest and open as I can in this one :)

Many folks have asked me the question "when are you going to have another one?" I've had this question asked so many times lately, friends, co-workers, family, strangers (when I tell them I have a 3year old). The question doesn't bother me but it always makes me wonder if I/we are doing the right thing by waiting.
I have dreamed since I was little of having a big family, as a kid I would tell you I wanted 5 kiddos with a set of twins in there but as I became a young adult I quickly realized how much kids cost and that the chances of me "getting" twins was slim to none so I thought ok I'll settle for 4 but no less! I craved a house with lots of people, noise and excitement! I wanted my kids to always have a playmate in the home.

But then Luke was born via c-section and my number changed again. I think we will most likely stop at 3. I always say that with a smile because I would love nothing more than a 4th surprise :)

But enough of that, I am very ready and very excited to be pregnant again! I know how I want the future nursery, I know what double stroller I will buy, I know what names will be in the running but we are still going to wait awhile.
We will wait because we want time with Lucas, I want him to remember being our everything, and I still want to grow as a person and mom, I want time with my husband and time to do fun things that we couldn't do as easily with two. 
Since we had Luke so young (well I was young) we always said we were going to wait until he is around 5 to bring another baby on board. But with him getting so big and independent it can be hard at times to not have a "baby" anymore. And I crave to have a baby with me again, it's the weirdest feeling. I can't wait to do everything all over again.

Another thing we have had to think about is finances, naturally. I had a hard time with Luke going to daycare when he was a newborn. And I told myself never again. So in order to be in a spot where I can stay home for a bit with new baby/babies we have to get Luke out of preschool. It is a very expensive school and while I don't regret for a second having him there it definitely is a factor.

All of that to say,
This past year Brent and I have been very wishy washy on when to "try" for babe #2, after his accident we were really in a place where we saw life as not guaranteed and we thought maybe we were supposed to go ahead and have our kids closer together. We went 4 months thinking that way and I didn't get pregnant.
We did have a scare (if you can call it that) this past February and quickly realized this was not our time and to continue to wait.
We have made our timeline and will start really thinking about going for baby #2 this time next year. Which doesn't seem very far aways and really it isn't. So while I wait I will be soaking up every second of Lucas I can get, trying new things as a family and maybe get one more vacation away with Brent.

It's hard, this planning a family thing. I often wonder if we will regret waiting so long to give Luke a sibling, he asks for a baby sister all. the. time. But I know in my heart it's what is right for us and if God has other plans that's ok too :)

*all images from pintrest*

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