Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Another one.....

I am not sure I will find the right words to put into this post so bear with me.

This Saturday I had another miscarriage. We are so hurt and confused by this.

With our last one the doctor was for certain that it was just a bad chromosome and it was a fluke thing. She told us to wait 2 months and we'd be fine.

2 months went buy and the next month I was pregnant again! We couldn't believe it happened that fast! I wasn't charting days or doing any OPKs it just happened! We were ecstatic yet apprehensive. A few weeks went by, we only told a select few people just to be on the safe side, we were nervously awaiting for our doctors appointment.

Then Saturday morning I saw the first signs and knew what was happening. I was so sad and angry! How can this be happening again! Why is this happening again? My pregnancy with Lucas was perfect, why can't I carry another.

The day went by and we tried to stay optimistic, Sunday morning I called the doctor and asked for some Progesterone, the hormone that sustains pregnancy, to see it that was the problem. I took 2 of the pills but it didn't help much, I think it was just to late.
Monday I went to the doctor and they confirmed the baby was gone. I knew it would be but needed to be told for certain.

I am scheduled for testing on November 6th. I am thankful they are going to do the testing and I am praying that nothing that can't be fixed is wrong.

I know God has a plan and I am ok with that, I am choosing to stay optimistic though this and I am truly learning what a precious gift babies are. Our time will come and that baby will be so very loved!

I am SO very thankful for Brent and Lucas, they keep me happy. I am thankful for good friends that I can talk to, and I am thankful for my heath and no pain.

Today I feel pretty good. I will be happy to get "life" going again without being so full of anxiety and I am ready to spend the holidays with my lovies.

Life is still SO good and I have SO much to be grateful for!

But as for me, I will always have hope;
I will praise you more and more
Psalm 71:14

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